Thursday, January 15, 2009 - Day 70

Quote of the Day: Actions lie louder than words. – Carolyn Wells

Breakfast – breakfast burrito

I know it isn’t what I should be eating BUT I needed something really fast today. I couldn’t think of anything better. It was egg, cheese and a flour tort.

Lunch – Healthy Choice soup – Chicken Tortilla

I really love soup and should only be eating them and salads. But some days, like today, I just can’t get it together to have a coherent thought let alone try to maintain a diet. Still, I think I’m doing pretty well since previously I would have eaten the kitchen sink. LOL!

Dinner – Salad bar with balsamic dressing, lots of veggies

I went out to play pennies and one moment I’m not at all hungry and the next starving. What’s up with that? Some days I just don’t understand what’s going on with me.

Snacks – goldfish

Steps – 3421

Exercise – Not a lot of steps but not a lot of motivation. Again, I just don’t get it. I haven’t been able to exercise much this week nor lift weights like last week at home. Motivation is at a low right now and it could be a lot of things. Maybe EPIC, maybe writing or maybe just life.

Journal

First, I have to comment on the fact that I just can’t believe I’ve kept with this for 70 days. Other than writing and my family, I haven’t kept to anything for this long. Maybe this is a new leaf.

Yeah I know it’s a bad thing BUT I just couldn’t seem to get it together today at all. There are strange things happening to my body as well as the general apathy. One of the things is that again, I’m swelling up like a stuck pig EVEN though I am getting up and walking around at least 5 minutes every hour. I hate whatever is happening to me again because I have so much water in me I know I’m going to weigh at least 15 pounds more when I go to see Dr. G and it’s moments like these where I want to chuck it all in and just give up.

Then there’s the fact that I’m breaking out everywhere. My face, my arms, my back and some of those are places I never did as a teenager. I know menopause can really screw up a person but this is going to drive me crazy. I’ve always fluxed 10-15 pounds when my period would be. Maybe this is the PMS without the actual period. Again, another thing for Dr. G tomorrow.

And I can’t. I MUST get healthy. This isn’t an either or situation any more. This is a MUST. I am not getting younger and I personally, don’t want to die fat. I know thin is relative and I’ve never really said how thin is thin. Well, when I was talking to CR the other day, I came up with the magic range. I’d like to weight somewhere between 135-142 and while it seems an impossible goal right now, if I can just stay the course until this passes, I will be good to go for another few pounds. Sign. I will get through this, I will.

Hope this helps someone! It does me a little as now I can see how weird it all is. LOL!

Have a great day!

Lynn

Wednesday, January 14, 2009 - Day 69

Quote of the Day: Strong reasons make strong actions. – William Shakespeare

Breakfast – Shake as normal with strawberry probiotic and fresh strawberries.

I really enjoy the shake better when I add one of the small yogurt type things to it. I’ve used the Dannon and the Promise heart version. I have really notices a difference when I don’t use them. So I guess they are helping me in the long run.

Lunch – Chips & salsa, Chicken fajitas

I was so good when I went out to lunch with CR. She pointed out that the fajitas would be better and she was right. But just that gentle prodding put me on the right track but I fear it won’t matter later because I am already craving something I don’t know about yet. That’s why I went to Mexican food. Must have been nervous about us going to the Erotic Heritage Museum but it didn’t matter as all went well.

Dinner – Salad with chicken, almonds, veggies and Balsamic vinegrette dressing

This didn’t do it for me. I noticed that something was changing this evening. I’m getting that starved, caveman like attitude where I want to eat everything in sight because I won’t know where the next meal is coming from…if this is an instinctual carry over…I wish it could be gone. LOL! This isn’t fun at all!

Snacks – Handful of salt and pepper chips and I didn’t want those until 9p!

Steps – 4351

Exercise – Hopped on the treadmill like it was any other day. Of course, I didn’t really feel well at all and didn’t really want to BUT I had to do it! At least I’m getting the fact I have to do it no matter what! And my free days at Anytime Fitness are over and I’ve definitely decided to join! They were over yesterday BUT since I only went three times last week, it’s time I started the real deal. LOL! Still, I have to take it nice and slow otherwise, I won’t do it. That’s one of the reasons I’ve kept up with the walking at least 5 days a week. Otherwise, it would be a bust.

Journal

Things were really going well until I got home. Then I don’t know what happened. Yeah, I was having a situation BUT that kind doesn’t normally make me want to eat. It was like a switch was suddenly on and where it came from, I just don’t know at all. And it was soo bad, when I did go look for a snack there was nothing. So, I grabbed the DH and made him go with me to the grocery store. We got what we needed and came home. I had my chips and it satisfied the urge. Hope it carries through till tomorrow.

Yes, these times are troubling to me as well. But the important part is I’m truly trying to get a handle on them and figure them out so they aren’t an obstacle in the future.

What are you doing to help yourself? I hope everyone is doing something on their weight loss journey that helps!

Have a great day!

Lynn

Friday, November 7, 2008 - Preparation Day

Quote of the Day: Don’t have one as this is the very first day journaling.

Breakfast – Unknown

My first visit to Dr. G. went extremely well and I felt that it was very productive. Dr. G. is a naturopath in the area where I live and I felt it very important to do this the right way. I had heard great things about her and have hope all will go well. Funny thing is that I had found her first, referred other people and they are the ones who have told me just how great she is. For me, she gave me a whole laundry list of things and I did manage to go shopping to load up on a lot of fresh foods: veggies, lean meats and fruits. I had really wanted to cook myself but I had a lunch date with a friend Kim T. Afterwards, I was really tired and took a nap. Kim T. and I talked about our possible new place and I’m still not convinced just yet.

Still, I purchased this journal and decided to start today as far as journaling goes. For the food journal, I think I’ll do it as I go meaning meal-journal, meal-journal. I also wanted to start cook in the evenings more if I can ever get my kitchen back. Sigh. Right now the chef, my DH – Gordon, loves it too much to really give it up. I will get there. I even plan to start a blog regarding the whole journey.

Lunch – This was at the local Golf Course. Salad w/Balsamic & Oil, Linguine w/chicken breast in cream tomato cilantro sauce (last fling), water & coffe.

Food was great and company fine. Told Kim T. about my visit to Dr. G. Talked about a lot of things, some good, some bad.

Dinner – Stir-fry veggies and chicken breast, 1 liter water

Wanted to do the cooking but the DH did it as usual. Will need to have it started before he comes home. The 16yo, Kyle, wants fast food yet again. IMHO pretty horrible for a diabetic yet he did say something about a taco salad.

Read email and enjoyed my favorite sci-fi shows on the Sci-Fi Channel. I love all the tech stuff – it gives me great ideas for my own stories.

Snacks – 2 apples

Steps – don’t know because I didn’t wear the pedometer today

Exercise – 25 minutes (8:50 to 9:15 p)

Journal

Okay – so I haven’t done any consistent walking recently – just hit and miss. Boy! Can I feel this one! It really hit me just how big my butt and stomach are right now. My lower back and hip joints weren’t happy although I personally feel good. I plan to continue to do this because the long term benefits are worth it.

Took supplements before I went to bed.

Hope this helps some of you struggling as well!

Lynn